Coming back to Canada, the place where I grew up, always stirs mixed emotions. I’m happy to be here, yet every visit reminds me how much life has changed. Friendships have faded over time, especially since I left in 2011, and each trip back feels like another reminder that some seasons never return. I see my parents growing older, and I wish I could hold time still.
Sometimes I think back to my late twenties, when I was training hard for triathlons, serving in church, and spending almost every day with my young-adult fellowship. Life felt full and vibrant. My parents were still active, and everything seemed possible. Part of me wishes I could go back, but life keeps moving forward whether I want it to or not. The harder I try to cling to the past, the faster it seems to slip away.
Yet this trip feels different. Maybe I am finally realising that no matter how precious the past was, I cannot return to it. What I do have is the present, and I want to make the most of it.
Living in Tanzania has taught me to take life one day at a time. Uncertainty is part of daily life there, and before this trip we went through a particularly stressful season. Our tyres were punctured with nails. Our fridge broke down the day before departure. We were searching for housing while also hearing rumours of unrest. Travel changes and logistics piled up all at once. It was exhausting.
That is why being here in Canada feels like a small breath of grace. I enjoy the simple things: water from the faucet, power that stays on, long snowy walks in the park, lifting weights at GoodLife, and watching my girls run joyfully into my parents’ home. I see the smile on my dad’s face as he plays with them, and my heart rests.
God is using Tanzania to change me. Instead of complaining about traffic or prices here, I feel grateful. I am grateful to be with my family. I am grateful for rest. I am grateful for moments that I know will not last forever.
I do not know what tomorrow will bring, and that is okay. I can live today fully because Christ is with us. The One who came to earth, bore our sins, and rose again walks with us now — in Canada, in Tanzania, and in every season of change. For today, that is enough.
